Best Jokes on
Life with wife
Anniversary Jokes- best on the Internet

Tips for Successful Marriage

Life After Marriage
Jokes on Husbands
Jokes on Wives
Men Vs Women
A Husband Vs A Dog
Patels...
Laloo Yadav...
Best Sardarji Jokes...

FUNNY CARTOONs ON YOU!!!
(I mean Computer lovers)

You and me...
Management101
Stereotypes..
Computer Professionals..

Workplace
The days of our lives...
Work Vs Prison

 

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Secret for a happy married life:
When you are wrong, admit it to your spouse; when you are right, keep your mouth shut.

Best Husband Jokes/Funny jokes on Married People on the Internet

Click here for best aniversary jokes

Just to make sure that women of the world do not make me their enemy or sue me (I am a trader anyway so the later is not going to get you any money ;)

Never ask your husband for a hair dryer with eyes closed LOL

 

Cool message by a wife which applies to most husbands:

Dear Mother-in-law, "Don't Teach me how 2 handle my children, I'm living with one of yours & he needs a lot of improvement"


Here are some jokes on husbands---- (forwarded by a friend, Tulsi Savani.)

One day a housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to his wife, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," She replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."


A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."


"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.


He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.


Q: What do you call an! intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor


A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband. Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger... Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy!


Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.

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Q : What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.

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Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

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Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"

Don't forget to read my TIPS ON SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE

Did you like my collection? If you come across some joke on married life, please forward it to me to make this collection even better.

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Click here for best aniversary jokes


How do these people seek a wife? (Forwarded by Ashok Dhingara. Thanks.)

FISHERMAN
Wife wanted, must be able to dig, clean, cook worms and clean fish. Must have own boat with motor. Please send photograph of motorboat.

SALESMAN
Once in a lifetime offer, to get yourself the original, genuine article. One of the most handsome and smartest bachelor's around is now looking for a wife. And you could be the lucky one he chooses! Has own house, car and successful career!

ECONOMIST
I am in demand of a wife. Supply is great though my requirements are high. However the Elasticity of my demands should not bear too heavy a burden upon the national interest.

MATHEMATICIAN
Wife required to complete the formula of my life. Must be numerate and understand complex algebraic logarithms. Needed to help further my family unit.

IT CONSULTANT
Well there is definite room for improvement in my life. The speed of my current flows of information and processes is slowing down and the injection of a wife into my life is bound to improve efficiency. Compatibility could be an issue.

BUSINESS MAN
Wife wanted for company.

POLITICIAN
I feel there is a need in this world, to improve the ways we live, to harmonize the processes of life and to build upon past differences and short comings. I believe that we the people need someone to share our lives. To feel the joys of parent hood, and bear the social responsibilities, as we should in a civilized society................. (etc etc and never getting to the point)

CAR DEALER
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife. Should be in excellent working condition.

FARMER
Wanted a wife from good stock. Required for breading.

LAWYER
I hereby propose to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of wife after marriage. The person whom I'm looking for should be strictly -a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl, with evidence to support this view that she is a girl. The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. Myself. Any objections would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in limited confidence as all liabilities are null and
void in the event of failure on our part of any kind whatsoever.

PILOT
Wife required to complete my life. Please only level headed applicants. She must not have her heads in the clouds, but have her feet firmly on the ground. Her heart must be in it for the long haul. And she absolutely must also be aerodynamically sound!!!

BANKER
Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.

SHAAYAR
Burri muddat keh baad eik arazoo jaagi hai,
Key hum bee shaadi shooda ho jaayeh,
Kya bahaana shaadi karaney ka............... joh
kurrey sarey sarey,
Yeah mai butaatah hoon .........
Kyoon key yaroo ub khud ghur keh kaam hotah nahee
sarey sarey.

ACCOUNTANT
Required a girl - 5'8' & 36' 24' 36' with a good head for figures. She must be averse to making unnecessary expenditure and her very nature should be one of generating as few expenses in my life as possible. She should profit from a nice personality and be a credit to her family.

SHIRABI
Wanted a girl. Girl's father should preferably have a drinks factory. I am an occasional alcoholic who drinks only when friends come round. Friends come round only seven times a week. Girl preferred who can carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally in a bar or send drinks for trial. Sample should be ample.

MINICAB DRIVER
Hello! Hello! number 9 calling. This is number 9 I'm calling from base, erm a wife is needed for pick me up. Driving license not necessary, but map reading
skills are a bonus.

BEGGAR
Allah kay naam peh koi eik biwi dey dey,
Doosrey kee nahi to upni hee dey dey,
Allah terah bullah kurrey,
Tujhey eik key balley doh dey dey,
Hillery hogi toh Monika bhi dey dey!

BUILDER
Wanted a wife to help build upon the foundations of my life. Must be homely and willing to build relationship from the ground up.

DOCTOR
I am looking for a wife to cure the emptiness in my life. However if you feel the need for a second opinion then it's fine by me.

ARMY COMMANDO
My mission in life is to find myself the perfect wife. Successful applicants must be able to use a penknife and a compass. She who dares wins. Camouflage provided.

RACE CAR DRIVER
A model wife required to fit in with my fast track life. Must be able to keep pace!

ASTRONAUT
I'm searching for a wife to fill the space in my life. Someone to share my universe. Must have looks that are out of this world!


 

 

 


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