a lawyer, and a computer scientist are discussing the merits of a mistress.
An artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with he risk of
A lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt, divorce,bankruptcy.
Not worth it. Too many problems.
A computer scientist says "It's the best thing that's ever happened
to me. My wife thinks I'm with my mistress. My mistress thinks
I'm home with my wife, and I can spend all night on the computer"
a long one...
Dhingara who checks his emails maybe every hour.)
An ambitious software engineer finally decided to take a vacation. He
booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of
his life. At least for a while. A hurricane came up unexpectedly. The
ship went down and was lost instantly.
The man found
himself swept up on the shores of an island with no other people, no supplies,
nothing. Only bananas and coconuts. Used to four-star hotels, this guy
had no idea what to do. So for the next four months he ate bananas, drank
coconut juice, longed for his old life, and fixed his gaze on the sea,
hoping to spot a rescue ship.
as he was lying on the beach, he spotted movement out of the corner of
his eye. It was a rowboat, and in it was the most gorgeous woman he had
ever seen. She rowed up to him. In disbelief, he asked her: "Where did
you come from, and how did you get here?"
"I rowed from the other side of the island," she said. "I landed here
when my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing," the software engineer said, "I didn't know anyone else had
survived. How many of you are there? You were really lucky to have a rowboat
wash up with you." "It's only me," she said, "and the rowboat didn't wash
up: nothing did."
was confused, "Then how did you get the rowboat?"
"Oh, simple," replied the woman. "I made it out of raw material that found
on the island. The oars were whittled from gum-tree branches, I wove the
bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a eucalyptus
"But, but, that's impossible," stuttered the man. "You had no tools or
hardware - how did you manage?"
"Oh, that was no problem," the woman said. "On the south side of the island,
there is a very unusual strata of exposed alluvial rock. I found that
if I fired it to a certain temperature, it melted into forgeable ductile
iron. I used that to make tools, and used the tools to make the hardware.
But enough of that. Where do you live?"
Sheepishly, the man confessed that he had been sleeping on the beach the
"Well, let's row over to my place then," she said.
After a few
minutes of rowing, she docked the boat at a small wharf. As the man looked
onto shore, he nearly fell out of the boat. Before him was a stone walk
leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the
woman tied up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man could
only stare ahead, dumbstruck. As they walked into the house, she said
casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would
you like to have a drink?"
"No, no, thank you," he said, still dazed. "I couldn't drink another drop
of coconut juice."
"It's not coconut juice," the woman replied. "I have made a still How
about a Pina Colada?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the software
engineer accepted,and they sat down on her couch to talk. After they had
exchanged their stories, the woman announced, "I'm going to slip into
something more comfortable. Would you like to have a shower and a shave?
There is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in the bathroom." No longer questioning
anything, the man went into the bathroom. There in the cabinet was a razor
made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a hollow-ground edge were
fastened to its tip inside a swivel mechanism.
"This woman is absolutely amazing," he mused.
"What next?" When he returned, the woman greeted him wearing nothing but
vines strategically positioned-and smelling faintly of gardenias. She
beckoned for him to sit down next to her.
"Tell me," she began suggestively, slithering closer to him, brushing
her leg against his, "We've both been out here for a very long time. You've
been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right
now, something you've been longing to do for all of these months." She
stared into his eyes.
believe what he was hearing - this was like all of his dreams coming true
in one day.
"You mean...," he replied, "I can check my e-mail from here?"
(contributed by Ashok
Dhingara who may be checking his emails right at this time!!!)